Ooo la la, when I say orgasm people get flushed, embarrassed, excited and I bet you have never thought of them as a way of increasing your personal development.
Orgasms are very personal, and if you are not having them, it’s very personal. Orgasms are also very powerful, they contract the body, send happy and good feeling hormones, give a sense of wellbeing, assist with pain reduction, build connector neurons with our Lovers. They can take us to states of bliss, ecstasy and communing with the cosmos.
Often we think our orgasms come from someone else doing something to us, the truth is our orgasmicness comes from ourselves and then we can share add to with someone else.
Our orgasms are a reflection of our lives, are we basking in the glory of them are we too busy running around with our ‘to do’ lists to even think about them, are you hoping one day you will finally get that ultimate fulfilling climax – like the movies. Are you comfortable – have a reasonable orgasm when you have sex, but you don’t want to go into the realm of ecstasy or deeper more intense, you are just fine. Are you uptight and don’t even know where to begin with an orgasm? Read my ONE IN EVERY 5 WOMEN NEVER ORGASM!… That Is A Problem… I HAVE THE SOLUTION!! Here…
There are many ways being curious and conscious about our orgasms helps our personal development, let’s begin with 3:
For any orgasms, then as we delve deeper and more have more intense ones (yes more than one is possible) we need connection:
Firstly, to our bodies, to know and trust them, it is unrealistic to expect someone else to know your body if you don’t – it can and does happen and even in these cases imagine the possibilities if both of you know your body- wowzer! Getting to know and be comfortable with your body is a practice often daily, noticing what it likes and doesn’t, slowing down enough to notice what is actually going on, being present with ourselves.
Secondly, to your partner, are you feeling safe, are you in sync together are you noticing and attending to each other from your own body or are you in their head trying to work out what is going on.
Connection requires a revealing of ourselves, how much do you reveal will depend on how you orgasm… Are you willing to reveal more of you?
Who is responsible for your orgasm…?
Who do you think, is it you? Them? Or something else?
Essentially you are responsible for your orgasm, we can always choose not to orgasm, this is a space of knowing if your body wants to climax or to circulate or ?. This is not usually the case, often when we don’t orgasm it is because we held back, went into our heads, didn’t ask for what we want, need or desire (does not mean we will get it), or our Lover was selfish and didn’t play, last or get connected enough for you to have an orgasm.
As you work through, how will I ask for what I need? How will I stay connected to my body and my partners without going into my head? How will I say to my partner ‘I would like us to play more, I would like to slow down and enjoy and savour each moment of our love making, I would like us to grow into a space of mutual pleasure?’
Which leads us beautifully to vulnerability.
Being vulnerable is often seen as a weakness and we think people will judge us and the truth is it actually brings us closer together.
We connect, we see beyond the persona, the masks, the roles often into someone’s soul their hearts and their authenticity. This level of depth creates intimacy and connection faster than anything else, it does not need to be soppy and sad.
- Vulnerability is sharing that place in you that you hide from others.
- Vulnerability is risking speaking, showing parts of you that you think others will judge.
- Vulnerability is being raw, authentic and open without expectation of the outcome.
I have had to work hard here, being vulnerable, trusting myself and others is still a major learning for me and I know when I have this sensation in my belly and heart that it is time, it is time to express, be seen and let the chips go where they need to go.
Connection, Responsibility and Vulnerability will lead you to greater more satisfying orgasms if you would like support and are interested in more contact me today for a sacred conversation.
Our lives are not separate, when we increase these areas in our intimacy they reflect in all other parts when we can ask our partners for…?, have discussions around our hidden parts – space frees up and we behave in the world with more genuine authentic interactions.
Myola Woods is an Author, Certified Sexological Bodyworker, Somatic Sex Educator, International Intimacy & Relationship Coach and Winner of the Altitude Awards, Rising Star – Brave Award 2018.
Contact Myola TODAY!. email@example.com