Only a third of women can consistently have orgasms – This means two thirds are unable to consistently have orgasms.
These statistics break my heart, from my work as a Somatic Sex Educator and my own experience I know there is a different way to be with orgasms.
I hear you saying “Myola, why is it all about orgasm” and I would answer “It is NOT all about orgasm when you have the choice for yourself, when you are staying in your body, following the pleasure and sensation, orgasm is often a byproduct… a natural occurrence from these activities, it is when we have NO choice and we are trying it becomes ALL about the orgasm.
‘Pre orgasmic’ is the technical term, a state of being aroused feeling pleasure and not able to reach climax. The pleasure goes around but never to the peak, I knew this state well, it is pleasureable and also frustrating, feels like it can take forever and waiting for that moment to finally get there, finally have that release.
There are many practices that say not to orgasm, to circulate, these techniques are wonderful to play with once you are at choice with your orgasms and you can choose yes or no. The difference of having no choice is exactly that it does not feel like freedom it feels like frustration.
From pre-orgasmic to premature…
Extremes is somewhere I like to live, for a while where I was a 30 second wonder and mostly I was happy with that, I was done. I have had 4 children, I had 3 under 5 years old during this time I had many experiences with orgasmicness, non orgasmicness, from never coming to super fast.. neither of these felt very satisfying long term or meant I actually knew what I was doing, or my body and I were connected and on the same page.
How did we get here? Often, we are told Women are more difficult to turn on, more difficult to become aroused, more difficult in general…. Society tells women they shouldn’t like sex – they should be sexy for sure and be objectified but to LIKE, LOVE, DESIRE sex well that’s not ladylike… Bull shit is what I say!
Women are amazing sexual creatures that we hide, to have a full orgasmic life means we need to be fully in life. We need to be comfortable in our bodies, know them, explore them and let ourselves have and receive pleasure.
Orgasms do amazing healing, cleaning, recalibration of our being and bodies, from improved pelvic health (less incontinence and slight bladder leak) from the increased blood flow and contractions, to the feelings of wellbeing from the hormones being released, to a state of complete relaxation and feeling bliss from your fight, flight or freeze being turned off.
It might seem a bit weird to have a sex coach or learn about orgasms, most of us have had poor or little education from school, society, Hollywood or well meaning friends but they are likely to be retrieving information from the same source of misinformation you were exposed to!… If you wanted to have your hair styled for a special event, would you go to your friends/best friend or a qualified hairdresser?… I am qualified to help women experience orgasm.
When I teach women about orgasms, I have strategies and techniques that are proven from me and my clients to work and efficiently with practice to move YOU to YOUR next level of orgasmicness…. These are steps that navigate you through the unknown and safely into your known orgasmic life.
I have an upcoming Orgasm Online Webinar Series, for all levels, from the basics to expanding to ejaculating, if you are intrigued and already having an orgasm, I will help you have more orgasms…If you are not having any orgasms, I will help you to start having orgasms… contact me today for a sacred conversation.
Myola Woods is an Author, Certified Sexological Bodyworker, Somatic Sex Educator, International Intimacy & Relationship Coach and Winner of the Altitude Awards, Rising Star – Brave Award 2018.